Sunshine Empire Maximise Texas

There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas.

When he arrived on the plane,he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!"

The person next to him answered,"Everything is big in Texas."

When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar.
Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!"

The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas."

After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally went past the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.

Scared to death, the blind man started shouting...

"Don't flush Don't flush!"

Sunshine Empire Different Types of Bra

The man walked into the ladies department at Neiman Marcus. Somewhat flustered, he shyly walked up to the woman behind the counter and stuttered, "Excuse me, but, I'd like to buy a bra for my wife"

"OK. What type of bra?" asked the clerk.

"Type?" inquires the man "There is more than one type?" Beads of sweat began rolling down his back and forehead.

"Look Around," said the saleslady, as she showed a veritable ocean of bras in every shape, size, color and material.

"Take heart," she said smiling. "You know, even with all of this variety, there are really only three types of bras..."

Relieved, yet a bit confused, the man asked what were the types.

The clerk replied "The Catholic type, the Salvation Army type, and the Baptist type. Which one do you need?"

More confused our here asked "What is the difference?"

The lady responded, "It is all really quite simple.

The Catholic type supports the masses,

The Salvation Army type lifts up the fallen,

and the Baptist type makes mountains out of mole hills."

Sunshine Empire Failure

Early in the 1970s a promising American pianist gave a concert in the chamber music room of the Erewan Hotel in Bangkok. The recital was only a few minutes old when the artist discovered that due to the climate's excessive humidity the D key of the treble clef began to stick repeatedly. As luck would have it, his programme comprised Bach's D minor Toccata and Fugue and his prelude and Fugue in D major.

The reviewer in the Bangkok Post also noted that there was a problem with the piano stool which had been so enthusiastically greased that during one of the more vigorous sections the pianist suddenly found himself swivelling round to face the audience.

Abandoning the Toccata in D minor, he moved on to Liszt's Fantasia in G minor, at which point the G key of the bass clef also stuck. To try and free the notes the virtuoso started kicking the lower section of the piano with his foot with the result that the piano's right leg soon gave way and the whole instrument tilted through 35 degrees.

At this point he rose, bowed and left the stage to audience applause. When he returned he had in his hand a fire axe with which he began to demolish the piano.

On hearing the resounding crash which followed, the ushers came rushing in and, with the help of the hotel manager, two watchmen and a passing policeman, finally succeeded in disarming the man and dragging him off stage.

http://terhune.net/jokes/index-failure.html

Sunshine Empire Easy Cash Easy Money

Please note that the HSBC Bank is installing new
"Drive-through" cashpoint machines, customers will
be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable users
to
use this new facility the following procedures have been drawn up.
Please
read the procedure that applies to your own circumstances (i.e. MALE or
FEMALE) and remember them for when you use the machine for the first
time.

MALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to the cash machine.
2 Wind down your car window.
3 Insert card into machine and enter PIN.
4 Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.
5 Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6 Wind up window
7 Drive off

FEMALE PROCEDURE
1 Drive up to cash machine
2 Reverse back the required amount to align car window to machine
3 Re-start the stalled engine
4 Wind down the window
5 Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.
6 Turn the radio down
7 Attempt to insert card into machine
8 Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive
distance from the car
9 Insert card
10 Re-insert card the right way up
11 Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside
back page
12 Enter PIN.
13 Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.
14 Enter amount of cash required
15 Check make up in rear view mirror
16 Retrieve cash and receipt
17 Empty handbag again to locate purse and place cash inside
18 Place receipt in back of cheque book
19 Re-check make-up again
20 Drive forwards 2 meters
21 Reverse back to cash machine
22 Retrieve card
23 Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot
provided
24 Give appropriate one-fingered hand signal to irate male drivers
queuing behind
24 Restart stalled engine and pull off
25 Drive for 2 to 3 miles
26 Release handbrake

http://www.bunchofbankers.co.uk/notices2.html

Sunshine Empire Bank President's Ball

An elderly woman walked into the main office of Chase Manhattan Bank building, holding a large paper bag in her hand. She told the young man at the teller's window that she wished to deposit
the $3 million in the bag and open an account at the bank. She said that first, though, she wished to meet the president of the bank due to the amount of money involved. The teller thought that to be a reasonable request, and, after opening the bag and seeing bundles of $1000 bills, which amounted to approximately $3,000,000, telephoned the bank president's secretary for an appointment for the lady.

The woman was escorted upstairs and ushered into the president's office. Introductions were made, and she stated that she liked to get to know people she did business with on a more personal basis. The president then asked her how she came into such a large sum of cash. "Was it inherited?" he asked. "No," she replied. He was quiet for several seconds, trying to think of where this elderly lady could possibly have come into $3 million.

"I bet," she offered. "As in horses?". "No," she replied, "as in people". Seeing his confusion, she explained that she just bet on different things with people. Suddenly, she said, "I'll bet you 25,000 that by 10 o'clock tomorrow morning your balls will be square."

The bank president figured she must be off her rocker and decided to take her up on the bet. He didn't know how he could lose. For the rest of the day, he was extremely cautious--he decided to stay home that evening and take no chances. $25,000 was at stake.

When he got up in the morning and took his shower, he checked to make certain that everything was O.K. There was no change in his scrotal appearance. He looked the same as always. He went to his
office and waited for the woman to come in at 10AM, humming as he went. He knew this was his lucky day. How often did he get handed $25,000 for doing nothing?

At 10 o'clock sharp, the woman was shown into his office. With her was a man. When the bank president asked her what the other man was with her for, she informed the president that he was her
lawyer and she always took him along when there was this much money involved in her betting.

"Well," she asked, "what about our bet?" "I don't know how to tell you this," he said, "but I'm the same as I've always been, only $25,000 richer." The old lady asked him to drop his pants so they could all see. The president complied. The old lady peered closely at his balls and then asked if she could feel them. "Well, okay," said the president, "$25,000 is a lot of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure." Just then, he noticed that the lawyer was quietly banging his head against the wall. The president asked the old lady, "What's wrong with him?"

She replied, "Nothing, except that I bet him $100,000 that by 10am today I'd have the Chase Manhattan Bank's president's balls in my hand."

http://www.afunworld.com/retirement-jokes/joke-311.htm

Sunshine Empire The Ladder to Success Joke

One day, Chucky came upon a big, long ladder that stretched into the clouds. He'd walked this way every day and this ladder was never there before. Curious and brave, he began to climb. Eventually, he climbed into the layer of clouds, and saw this rather large, homely woman lying here on a cloud.

She spoke, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Chucky figured success had to be better than this, so he continued climbing. He came upon another level of clouds, and found a thinner, cuter woman than before.

She also spoke, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Chucky saw that his luck was changing and so continued his climb. On another level of clouds, he found a rather attractive woman with not so bad of a figure.

She stated, "Take me now or climb the ladder to success!" Chucky really liked his advantage now! He climbed quickly and deftly, and sure enough, on the next level, he found a gorgeous, lithe, well-endowed woman lying seductively on the cloud.

"Take me now or climb the ladder to success," she huskily whispered. Chucky couldn't believe his eyes, but his greed got the best of him. He climbed to the next level, expecting Aphrodite or similar. Suddenly, the ladder ends, and a latch closes behind him. He looks over to see a 400-pound, 6'8" hairy biker-looking guy with tattoos. The biker gets up and walks menacingly toward Chucky.

Apprehensively, Chucky whispers, "Who are you?" The biker answers, "I'm Cess."
www.whichquote.com

Sunshine Empire Changes Name

Aaron Thetires (Air in the Tires)
Abe Rudder (Hey Brother)
Abbie Birthday (Happy Birthday)
Abel N. Willan (Able and Willing)
Achilles Punks (I'll Kill These Punks)
Adam Bomb (Atom Bomb)
Adam Meway (Out of My Way)
Adam Sapple (Adam's Apple)
Adolf Oliver Nippils (Ate Off All Of Her Nipples)
Al B. Zienya (I'll Be Seeing You)
Al DePantzeu (I'll De-Pants You)
Al Gore-Rythim (Algorithym)
Al Kaholic (Alcoholic)
Al Kaseltzer (Alkaseltzer)
Al Kickurass (I'll Kick Your Ass)
Al Killeu (I'll Kill You)
Al Luminum (Aluminum)
Al Nino (El Nino)
Al O'Moaney (Alimony)
Alpha Kenny Wun (I'll Fuck Anyone)
Alec Tricity (Electricity)
Alex Blaine Layder (I'll Explain Later)
Alf Abet (Alphabet)
Ali Gator (Ali Gator)
Allota Fagina (A lot of vagina)
Amanda B. Recandwithe (A Man to Be Reckoned With)
Amanda Lay (A Man To Lay)
Amanda Hugnkiss (A Man to Hug and Kiss)
Andy Gravity (Anti-Gravity)
Andy Structible (Indestructible)
Anita Cock (I need a cock)
Anita Bath (I Need A Bath)
Anita Hoare (I Need A Whore)
Ann B. Dextrous (Ambidextrous)
Ann Chovie (Anchovy)
Ann Tartica (Antartica)
Anna Linjection (Anal Injection)
Anna Mull (Animal)
Anna Rexiya (Anorexia)
Anne T. Lope (Antelope)
Annie Buddyhome (Anybody Home)
Annie Mah (Enema)
Ariel Hassle (A Real Hassle)
Artie Choke (Artichoke)
Aunty Biotic (Anti-Biotic)
Ayma Dommy (I'm A Dummy)
Ayma Moron (I'm a Moron)
Barb Dwyer (Barbed Wire)
Barb E. Cue (Barbecue)
Barry D'Alive (Buried Alive)
Barry D. Hatchett (Bury the Hatchett)
Barry Shmelly (Very Smelly)
Bart Ender (Bartender)
Bea O'Problem (B.O. Problem)
Bea Sting (Bee Sting)
Beau Vine (Bovine)
Ben Crobbery (Bank Robbery)
Ben Dover (Bend Over)
Ben O'Drill (Benadryl)
Ben Thair (Been There)
Ben Lyon (Been lieing)
Bess Twishes (Best Wishes)
Betty Bangzer (Bet He Bangs Her)
Betty Beatzer (Bet He Beats Her)
Betty Humpser (Bet He Humps Her)
Bill Board (Billboard)
Bill Ding (Building)
Bill Leeake (Belly Ache)
Bill Lowney (Bologna)
Bjorn Free (Born Free)
Bo Nessround (Bonus Round)
Bob Frapples (Bob for Apples)
Bowen Arrow (Bow and Arrow)
Boyd Schidt (Bird Shit)
Brice Tagg (Price Tag)
Brighton Early (Bright and Early)
Brook Lynn Bridge (Brooklyn Bridge)
Bud Weiser (Budweiser)
Burnedette Down (Burnt it Down)
Buster Cherry (Bust her Cherry)
Buster Hymen (Bust her Hymen)
Cal Culator (Calculator...duh)
Cal Efornia (California)
Cal Seeium (Calcium)
Candice B. DePlace (Can This Be The Place)
Candice B. Fureal (Can This Be For Real)
Carl Arm (Car Alarm)
Carlotta Tendant (Car Lot Attendant)
Carra S. Midown (Caress Me Down)
Carrie DeKoffin (Carry the Coffin)
Carrie Oakey (Karaoke)
Carson O. Gin (Carcinogen)
Casey Deeya (Quesadilla)
Casey Needzit (In Case He Needs It)
Chad Terbocks (Chatterbox)
Chanda Lear (Chandalear)
Chi Spurger (Cheeseburger)
Chris Ko (Crisco)
Chris Mass (Christmas)
Chris P. Nugget (Crispy Nugget)
Chuck Mysak (Chuck My Sack)
Chuck Roast (Hmmm...Chuck Roast?)
Claire DeAir (Clear the Air)
Clara Nett (Clarinet)
Clara Sabell (Clear as a Bell)
Claude N. Skretchem (Clawed and Scratched Them)
Clint Toris (Clitoris)
Cody Pendant (Co-Dependant)
Cole Kutz (Cold cuts) See
Colette A. Day
Colin Allcars (Calling all Cars)
Colleen Cardd (Calling Card)
Connie Lingus (Cunnilingus)
Craig Potz (Crackpots)
Craven Moorehead (Craving More Head)
Crystal Ball (Crystal Ball)
Curt N. Rodd (Curtain Rod)
Curt Zee (Curtsy)
Cy Burns (Sideburns)
Cy Kosis (Psychosis)
Dale E. Bread (Daily Bread)
Dan D. Lyon (Dandelion)
Dan Druff (Dandruff)
Dan Geruss (Dangerous)
Dan Gleebitz (Dangly Bits)
Danielle Soloud (Don't Yell So Loud)
Darius Lesgettham (There He Is, Let's Get Him)
Darrell B. Moore (There'll be More)
Daryl Lect (Derelict)
Dawn Keebals (Donkey Balls)
Dee Capitated (Decapitated)
Dee Faced (Defaced)
Dee Sember (December)
Dennis Toffice (Dentist Office)
Denny Juan Heredatt (Did Anyone Hear That?)
Des Buratto (Desperado)
Diane Toluvia (Dyin' to Love Ya)
Di O'Bolic (Diobolic)
Dick Cumoff (Dick Come Off)
Dick Gozinia (Dick Goes In Ya)
Dick Head (Uhhh...Dick Head)
Dick N. Cider (Dick Inside Her)
Dick Zucker (Dick Sucker...You Know Who You Are)
Dick Tater (Dictator)
Didi Reelydoit (Did He Really Do It?)
Dinah Sore (Dinosaur)
Doll R. Bill...(Dollar Bill)
Don Thatt (Done That)
Doug Graves (Dug Graves)
Douglas S. Halfempty (The Glass is Half Empty)
Drew Blood (Drew Blood)
Drew Peacock (Droopy Cock)
Duane DeVane (Drain the Vain)
Dustin D. Furniture (Dusting the Furniture)
Dwayne Pipes (Drain Pipes)
Dylan Weed (Dealin' Weed)
Earl E. Byrd (Early Bird)
Eda Dick (Eat a dick)
Ed Ible (Edible)
Ed Jewcation (Education)
Ed Venture (Adventure)
Eileen Dover (I Leaned Over)
Ella Vader (Elevator)
Elle O'Quent (Eloquent)
Ellie Noise (Illinois)
Ellis Dee (L.S.D)
Elmer Sklue (Elmer's Glue)
Emma Roids (Hemorrhoids)
Eric Shun (Erection)
Evan Lee Arps (Heavenly Harps)
Evans Gayte (Heavan's Gate)
Eve Hill (Evil)
Eve Ning (Evening)
Eve O'Lution (Evolution)
Ewan Whatarmy (You and What Army?)
Faye Kinnitt (Faking It)
Faye Slift (Face Lift)
Faye Tallity (Fatality)
Fletcher Bisceps (Flex Your Bisceps)
Frank Furter (Frankfurter)
Freida Convict (Free the Convict)
Frank N. Stein (Frankenstein)
Gabe Asher (Gay Basher)
Gabe Barr (Gay Bar)
Gene E. Yuss (Genius)
Gene Poole (Gene Pool)
Ginger Vitis (Gingervitis)
Gil T. Azell (Guilty as Hell)
Gladys Eeya (Glad to See Ya)
Gus Comzadia (Gas Comes Outta Ya)
Gus Tofwin (Gust of Wind)

More at http://www.101funjokes.com/funny_names.htm

Sunshine Empire Who's Guilty

One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someoneandwritten the word 'penis' in tiny small letters. She turned around,scanned the class looking for the guilty face.

Finding none, she quickly erased it,and began her class.The next day shewent into the room, and she saw, in larger letters, the word 'penis' again n the black board.Again, she looked around in vain for the culprit, but found none, so sheproceeded with the day's lesson.

very morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found thesame word written on the board, each day's word, larger than the previousday's word. inally, one day, she walked in, expecting to be greeted by the same word onthe board, but instead, found the words,

"The more you rub it, the bigger it gets!"

Sunshine Empire Money isn't everything

It can buy a house, but not a home.
It can buy a bed, but not sleep.
It can buy a clock, but not time.
It can buy you a book, but not knowledge.
It can buy you a position, but not respect.
It can buy you medicine, but not health.
It can buy you blood, but not life.
It can buy you sex, but not love.

So you see, money isn't everything...

I tell you all this because I am your friend, and as your friend I want to take away your pain and suffering... so send me all your money, and I will suffer for you.

A truer friend than me you will never find...

CASH ONLY, PLEASE!

Sunshine Empire Car

Enjoy the funny commercials

Sunshine Empire Gold

Five men were selected for a survey. They were taken away to a hotel called the goldings. There they found the place covered top to bottom in golden fittnigs and furnishings, the doors were gold, the floor was gold, the roof was gold, the stairs were gold. Every thing in the lobby was gold.

They were shown to there rooms by a maid. She had golden hair , golden dress , golden tights , golden shoes , golden piney and a golden hat. She shown each man in to his room.

The rooms were decorated in yet more gold. Golden beds , golden pillows , golden windows, golden toothbrushes , golden chocolates, golden soap, golden bathrobes, golden pictures .

They woke up that morning to have a bath in a golden bath with golden taps , golden mirrors , golden tiles and a golden toilet.

They were led to the golden dining room via the golden staircase. The dining room was exquisitive. Golden walls , golden chairs, golden table goldern knives and falks , golden spoons and a golden table cloth.

The golden maids came in and asked if they would like cereal or poridge for breakfast , while the men talked about how posh the place was.

The first man asked for porridge , as did the second third and forth , the fifth asked for cereal.


and ladies and gentlemen this proves that 4 in 5 men prefer porridge!

Sunshine Empire Taking Wealth with Him

As Mr. Smith was on his death bed, he attempted to formulate a plan that would allow him to take at least some of his considerable wealth with him. He called for the three men he trusted most--his lawyer, his doctor, and his clergyman. He told them, "I'm going to give you each $30,000 in cash before I die. At my funeral, I want you to place the money in my coffin so that I can try to take it with me."

All three agreed to do this and were given the money. At the funeral, each approached the coffin in turn and placed an envelope inside.

While riding in the limousine back from the cemetery, the clergyman said, "I have to confess something to you fellows. Brother Smith was a good churchman all his life, and I know he would have wanted me to do this. The church needed a new baptistery very badly, and I took $10,000 of the money he gave me and bought one. I only put $20,000 in the coffin."

The physician then said, "Well, since we're confiding in one another, I might as well tell you that I didn't put the full $30,000 in the coffin either. Smith had a disease that could have been diagnosed sooner if I had this very new machine, but the machine cost $20,000 and I couldn't afford it then. I used $20,000 of the money to buy the machine so that I might be able to save another patient. I know that Smith would have wanted me to do that."

The lawyer then said, "I'm ashamed of both of you. When I put my envelope into that coffin, it held my personal check for the full $30,000."

Sunshine Empire Saving Some Gas Money

With fuel prices soaring new highs, now Sunshine Empire shows you how you can save some gas money...


A Funny Way to Save Some Gas Money

Sunshine Empire Plan

In the beginning was the Plan.

And then came the Assumptions.

And the Assumptions were without form.

And the Plan was without substance.

And darkness was upon the face of the Workers.

And they spoke among themselves, saying, "It is a crock of sh*t, and it stinks."

And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said, "It is a pail of dung, and we can't live with the smell.

And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, "It is the container of the excrements, and it is very strong, such that none may abide by it."

And the Mangers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength."

And the Directors spoke among themselves, saying to one another, "It promotes growth, and it is very powerful."

And the Vice Presidents went to the President, saying unto him, "This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the company with very powerful effects."

And the President looked upon the Plan and saw that it was good.

And the Plan became Policy.

And that is how sh*t happens.

Sunshine Empire Investment

An American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Greek village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.

The American complimented the Greek on the quality of his fish and asked, "How long does it take to catch them?" The Greek replied: "Only a little while."

The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Greek said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs. The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"

The Greek fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play cards with my friends, I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats.

Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution.

You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Athens, then London and eventually New York where you will run your expanding enterprise."

The Greek fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?" To which the American replied, "15-25 years."

"But what then?" The American laughed and said that's the best part. "When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."

"Millions ... Then what?" The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play cards with your friends."

Don't arrest the Sunshine Empire Judge

A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat.

He stopped the car and asked, "Why, Irish Mike, this wouldn't be your new beat out here in the sticks, would it?"

"That it is, "Irish Mike replied grimly, "ever since I arrested the judge on his way to the masquerade ball."

"You mean you pinched his honor?" asked Pat.

"How was I to know that his convict suit was only a costume?" demanded Mike.

"Well," mused Pat, "there's a lesson in this somewhere."

"That there is," replied Irish Mike...." 'Tis wise never to book a judge by his cover."

Sunshine Empire Charged as Guilty

A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side. The lawyer immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up. Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically.

His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it. When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in disgust and disbelief.

"I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."

"My God!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex?"

Sunshine Empire Marketing Joke

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You go up to her and say, "Hi, I'm great in bed, how about it?"
That's Direct Marketing.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You give your friend a buck. She goes up and says "Hi, my friend over there is great in bed, how about it?"
That's Advertising.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You somehow get her mobile number. You call and chat her up a while and then say "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Tele-Marketing.

You go to a party and see an attractive girl across the room. You recognize her. You walk up to her, refresh her memory and get her to laugh and giggle and then suggest, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Customer Relationship Management.

You go to a party and you see an attractive girl across the room. You stand straight, you talk soft and smooth, you open the door for the ladies, you smile like a dream, you set an aura around you playing the Mr. Gentleman and then you move up to the girl and say, "Hi, I am great in bed, how about it?"
That's Hard Selling.

You go to a party, you see an attractive girl across the room. SHE COMES OVER and says, "Hi, I hear you're great in bed, how about it?"
Now THAT is the power of Branding.

Sunshine Empire Email Hack

Oops! Sunshine Empire's email is hacked! Check out the video to see how we realised it happen...


How To Know If Your Email Is HACKED!!!!

Sunshine Empire Corporate Jokes

The Sunshine Empire Businessman

A young businessman had just started his Sunshine Empire firm. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques. Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear as a big shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.

He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, "Can I help you?"

The man said, "Yeah, I've come to activate your phone lines."

-------------------------------------------------------------------

The Sunshine Empire Scam

An online video on the parody of "Making Money" Scam programmes.

Sunshine Empire refunds Money back to Crooks

Some thieves got a taste of their own “money” when they passed counterfeit bills at a Cincinnati area Wal-Mart store.

In a bizarre twist that involved two transactions and three different trips to the Wal-Mart Store in Westwood, employees were determined to teach them a lesson.

The employees are calling the thieves the dumbest criminals in the Tri-state area.

They say they used their counterfeit money to buy items, but later returned those items to get a cash refund of legitimate bills.

But the store manager had a different idea.

“A male came into the store, purchased approximately $400 worth of merchandise –a DVD player, some DVDs,” said Lieutenant Russ Neville, a Cincinnati police officer.

Wal-Mart-mart management says that after the man left, an employee noticed the money was fake — but it was too late.

They never expected what happened next.

“A female came back a short time later with a receipt from that purchase and returned approximately $300 worth of the merchandise,” said Lt. Neville.

Employees say she was hoping to get real money with her return, but Wal-Mart says they recognized the receipt and made the decision to give back the bogus bills.

Management says the thieves actually had the gall to come back a third time, less than an hour later to complain that they had been given counterfeit money.

The manager told them they could take their concerns to the police, and they left.

“I think that shows that Wal-Mart is so smart if they picked up on that,” said Neville.

On the other hand, they could go spend the counterfeit money at another business establishment.

And that’s something police say they’re looking into — why the store gave the money back, knowing it could end up in circulation again.

But the Wal-Mart store’s management says they used a counterfeit detecting pen that left obvious black marks all over the bills, that most cashiers would pick up on.

The Wal-Mart corporation had no comment about why the bills were returned.

In the meantime police say they have no suspects at this time and plan to request surveillance video from Wal-Mart to help them with their investigation.

True Criminal Jokes @ http://www.dumbcrooks.com/

Sunshine Empire gives out Money to Brighten your Day

Wait a second! I think i meant "Money Jokes" instead of "Money" haha! Enjoy the jokes brought to you by Sunshine Empire Blog.

I Need a LOAN!

A young man was having some money problems, and needed $200 to get his car fixed and road-worthy again. But had run out of people to borrow from. So, he calls his parents via the operator, and reverses the charge and says to his dad, "I need to borrow two hundred dollars."

At the other end, his father says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, son, I think there may be a bad line."

The boy shouts, "Two hundred. I need two hundred dollars!"

"Sorry, I still can't hear you clearly," says his father.

The operator cuts in, "Sorry to butt in, but I can hear him perfectly."

The father says, "Oh, good. YOU send him the money!"

My Husband is a Millionaire!

A woman proudly told her friend, "I'm responsible for making my husband a millionaire."

"Well what was he before he married you?" the friend asked.

"A billionaire."

The Offer

A millionaire throws a massive party for his fiftieth birthday. During the party, he's a bit bored and decides to stir things up a bit. He grabs the mic and announces to his guests that down in the garden of his mansion he has a swimming pool with two great white sharks in it. He offers anything he owns to anyone who will swim across that pool.

The party continues for some time with no one accepting his offer, until suddenly there's a loud splash. All the party guests run to the pool to see what has happened, and in the pool a man is frantically swimming as hard as he can. Fins come out of the water and jaws are snapping and the guy just keeps on going. The sharks are gaining, but the guy manages to reach the end and he leaps out of the pool, soaked.

The millionaire grabs the mic and says, "I am a man of his word, anything of mine I will give—-for you are the bravest man I have ever seen. So, what will it be?" the millionaire asks.

The guy grabs the mic and says, "Why don't we start with the name of the person that pushed me in!"

Sunshine Empire presents the All Time Funniest Football Moments

Euro 2008 was largely boring. Now, Sunshine Empire brings you the funniest moments in Soccer! Do note that the video comes with some scenes of injuries and if you are easily affected by them, don't watch. If not, let us bring sunshine to you~


Funny Football Moments And Painful Injurier


Play Sports but take precaution for safety :)

Sing your way to Malaysian Idol

Want to become an idol but still not there yet?

Check out how the Malaysians are training for Malaysian Idol!



Hope Sunshine Empire gave you a good laugh today!

Welcome to Sunshine Empire

Welcome to Sunshine Empire!

We promise to make your day a joyous and delightful one.

We name this blog to be Sunshine Empire because we want to develop this site into an empire of happy people, blooming just like the Sun.

Stay tuned!